December 23, 2016

A friend was giving a talk titled: “What happens when we talk about Earth… on Earth?” He presented various infographics on varying worldviews throughout the regions of the world while concluding that the way we think about our planet is inherently biased due to our limited knowledge about living on other worlds. He also showed how the dominant worldviews change over the course of the day as certain people wake up and go to sleep. He asked if I wanted a handout of the slides to which I said yes before he told me that other people wanted them as well. “Oh, that’s fine then” I said, offering the presentation materials to whoever else wanted them.

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We were sitting on the bench swings late at night and I was watching someone play a game on their handheld console. I had my leg propped up for comfort because of the way the bench was leaning, but this deeply upset the person to my left. I barely had time to apologize before he angrily shouted at me: “I’m not implying your incompetence. I’m implying you’re purposefully trying to fuck with me. Now Leave.”

I didn’t know what to do so I stood up immediately and started to walk across the empty parking lot to head back to campus. My head felt heavier and heavier until I collapsed on the concrete. I was afraid that me being on the floor would be interpreted as a cry for attention so I forced myself to get back up despite not having the energy in my limbs to do so. I repeatedly fell onto the floor for every few steps I managed to take until I got into a building.

Once I was in the library, the only thing I could think about was what assignments I had due for tomorrow and the fact that I wouldn’t have enough time to do them if I wanted to complete them while being conscious. I passed out before reaching the stairs.